Give One, Get One in November

The one-laptop-per-child program wants to send laptops to kids in developing nations, or in other words, Megan and my future students. Starting mid-November, if you send a laptop to one of these kids, you’ll get one for yourself too . These laptops use open-source software, so you will not be subjecting the world's poor to Microsoft Vista colonialism or a shoddily constructed ibook that will explode three times like my ibook did. Already have a laptop? Send your get-one to David Markson. I hear he’s a total luddite and uses an obsolete system of novel writing (popularized by Nabokov) called: notecards.

Literature to make out with...

Making out with Jane Bowles reminded me there is a whole genre of literature with which one might like to make out. Unfortunately, much of this writing is hard to find because people are too busy making out with books whose authors are naturally talented at self-promotion. We would like to get our greasy fingerprints all over Stacey Levine’s new book, but someone needs to publish it first. Please, someone, publish Stacey Levine’s new book! Put the title in a nice sans-serif font. We will promote her with quirky You-Tube videos and websites drawn on refrigerators in dry erase marker. Publish, and publish soon, because October is our most creative month.

Kathy Rules the Universe

Megan hated her book and could not look at it anymore even though she did not feel it was finished.

One day while Megan was complaining again Kathy said, "Uh, I think your book is done."

Megan said, "Oh. Okay."

Kathy is smart. Megan would trust Kathy with her life.

"Okay," Megan said. "My book is done."

Now she doesn't have to look at it anymore, which will alleviate a lot of sadness and tantrum-throwing and accidental vomiting.

Moral: That Kathryn is a good egg.