Tuesday, April 15, 2008

REAL celebrity CRUSH



I am my own celebrity crush!

Did I mention that these photos have NOT been retouched?!!? GOD! Look at those teeth.

My hair is as soft as a duckling-butt and my nose as cute as a kitten's nipple! My chin is as smooth as the knee of a Great Dane taking its first breath after emerging from its mother's womb. My brows are fuzzy but neat like the belly of a chimp. I smell like....are there any animals that smell good....umm...a chihua- no. I smell like the flower-scented beak of a hummingbird collecting its sweet, sweet nectar. My bosom is supple and firm like the shoulder of a champion race horse. They call it animal magnetism...you need it to be a celebrity.

4 comments:

Sarah said...

This is hilarious. You are my celebrity crush.

Kathy said...

you are my #1 celebrity crush too!

Megan said...

i wither when your head shots are absent from our blog. sarah you better watch out or your lady friend's gonna get snatched up by an indian-an.

Gloria, Writer Reading said...

I am so psyched! Leaving a personal comment for a celebrity. Great dscription. Not one cliche.