Friday, April 18, 2008

chicago earthquake teaches us an important moral lesson


In Seattle, we had an earthquake once where the building hopped up and down for two terrifying minutes. I stood in a doorway, like they did during the earthquake episode of Beverly Hills 90210. Some of my coworkers had panic attacks or crawled on the floor, awaiting death. All I could think about was: why didn't I buy a latte this morning? I was going to die all uncaffeinated.

After the pathetically small earthquake in Chicago this morning, I invite you all to reconsider how you could have spent the earthquake, such as delivering a baby in an elevator, like Brandon did, or going to therapy, like Donna did at the suggestion of that boyfriend who threw her down the stars.

UPDATE: I guess we had a second earthquake about 20 minutes after I posted this. I didn't notice at all, though the projector in my classroom looked a little wonky.

7 comments:

Anonymous said...

I remember that episode! Oh, I love those kids. I spent the earthquake waking up for a few seconds and thinking I was hallucinating and then going back to sleep.

potato said...

I hope we have another one. Natural disaster is exciting and gives people something to talk about at parties.

Megan said...

i slept right on through it. i didn't know about it until my therapist told me this morning, and used it as his excuse for being late.

Megan said...

meghan you better come to my party. i promise to hang out with you outside all night, smoking cigs on the back landing. i like calling it a landing; really it's just a stairwell.

potato said...

I have to uh, do my laundry. What time is it at? Can I get there right at the end and help everyone escape? I think I have a rope ladder somewhere near the vacuum in the back of my car.

Kathryn said...

when the earthquake shook my bed, my mostly asleep brain thought it was a ghost. then i got scared and it took me a long time to go back to sleep. you know, because of the ghost. the girl who believes in voodoo still lives inside me.

i totally felt the second one too!

potato said...

I thought my room in college was haunted by ghosts who scratched the bedframe at night, but it was just rats.