Wednesday, August 15, 2007

Don't feel sad, Tao Lin. We'll write to you, too.


It's time to write to our favorite terrifyingly bearded graphic novelist, Alan Moore.


By the way, I like the idea of giving the authors of our book club books short-notice invitations. Maybe in 25 years, every author around the globe will feel a tingling anticipation twice a month: Will this time be the one? Will they receive the VL invite? Just think, all of that potential for joy or devastation resting in our hot little hands. The power!
Also, I don't like that we're a "book club." It makes me feel simultaneously like a second grader and a suburban mom. Let's be a collective or something instead.


I'll start:


Dear Alan Moore,


You seem like you're reclusive.

7 comments:

Kathryn said...

i agree that book club sounds silly. although i kind of like things that sound silly because they're so non-pretentious. for example:

once in highschool i asked a boy that i liked if he wanted to be pen pals. i thought it would be funny but then i immediately felt humiliated.

but collective sounds good too.

i don't have anything to say to alan moore because i just started reading watchmen.

but we should explain what confusion nachos are to tao.

Megan said...

Dear Alan Moore,

You seem reclusive. You have bangin' hair. We are also reclusives with bangin' hair, which is why we would like to invite you to the next meeting of our literary collective, Venom Literati.

Anonymous said...

Okay, Dee Oh Double Gee.

You're in charge of starting off the letter to Tao Lin (that everyone can get in on till tomorrow). I will work on Alan Moore (everyone can add or subtract till tomorrow).

Dear Alan Moore,

You seem quite reclusive. Nonetheless, we wish to invite you to come to Sarah and Abby's deck this Friday evening at 8:00 central time.

We will be discussing The Watchmen. Also, we are totally a gang of awesome female superheroes: Subtle Sabotage, The Interruptor, The Voice, The Blade and The Lovernator.

We will throw a cream pie at you, promise and forget to pay your mobile phone bill, sing you to sleep, derail you mid-speech, and make what you suspect to be--but can't quite confirm is--a really cutting remark.

Did I mention that we're super-hot? And not just ComicCon hot. Actual hot.

If you do not show, you will spend the rest of your life fearing Awkward Silence.

Your friends,
Venom Literati

Anonymous said...

Oooo oooo! Simul-posting!

How about this (Feel free to add more. I'm just overly enthusiastic):

Dear Alan Moore,

You seem reclusive. You have bangin' hair. We are also reclusives with bangin' hair, which is why we would like to invite you to the next meeting of our literary collective, Venom Literati.

We will be discussing The Watchmen. Also, we are totally a gang of awesome female superheroes: Subtle Sabotage, The Interruptor, The Voice, The Blade and The Lovernator.

We will throw a cream pie at you, promise and forget to pay your mobile phone bill, sing you to sleep, derail you mid-speech, and make what you suspect to be--but can't quite confirm is--a really cutting remark.

Did I mention that we're super-hot? And not just ComicCon hot. Actual hot.

If you do not show, you will spend the rest of your life fearing Awkward Silence.

Megan said...

book club is silly. i got really attached to the phrase, "the hottest book club on the planet," though.

it's like there being a hot tupperware party; there's something awful and 50's and wholesome about it. and it is something that is usually SOOOO not hot.

collective, on the other hand, sounds very professional. are we professionals? do we want to be? i don't know the answer. maybe we need a mission statement.

we could change it to something silly or unexpected but smart--maybe something we invent; a term for it that we invent. not silly like "venom literati," but silly like...i dunno...gimme a minute...biblio-collective...maybe that's stupid, but something new and different and nonstuffy?

Megan said...

nice! i love that letter! good job!

Kathryn said...

this letter is complete. sign it:

Your Friends,

Venom Literati