Wednesday, August 1, 2007

I Don't Wanna Hear About Yo Boring Ass Dream, Mutha*!$%@*!

I will be frank: I hate hearing about peoples' dreams, unless they are Kathy or Sarah. If somebody says: "I had this fucked up dream last night," I immediately tune out. But Hugh Laurie and the rollerskating white nonlearners are pretty great.

I used to date someone who had the most literal dreams ever--they all took place at his childhood home, or his high school, and nothing interesting or absurd ever happened in them, except for the occasional tornado, which he was scared of in real life anyway.

So whenever he said: "I had this fucked up dream..." I knew that really it would just be the same dream, on repeat, and that I was about to hear it for the thousandth time and feel overwhelmed by a huge sense of deja vu that then extended to my whole life.

I think there is a problem with that, that maybe there is a problem with you if you're having the same dream over and over AND it's boring and literal and about high school. This should have been a sign. Why did I not see it? The interpretation of dreams should be a tool to remove stupid people from our lives--or to lure hot people (like Hugh Laurie) into them. We should listen more carefully.

I used to dream about cats, black cats, clinging to me while I ran around in abandoned buildings and leapt around on the scaffolding. But not anymore. I don't really dream that much, but when I do it's always different and always absurd, which maybe just means I'm scattered, or that my life has no boundaries or foundation or something, which is probably true.

2 comments:

Anonymous said...

I do so solemnly swear to only post interesting dreams, or to only post weird thoughts disguised as dreams that reveal too much about me for me to claim.

Kathryn said...

I bet you dream about drowning in tex mex. I bet you don't really write stories, you just record your dreams and they come out brilliant--heart broken girls on pogo sticks, etc.