Friday, October 5, 2007

A little cleavage and a lotta tooth.


I think if you want to get anywhere in this world you gotta show a little cleavage and a lotta tooth. DEFINITELY not the other way around. Too much cleavage is folly and little teeth are just creepy. If you have little teeth--- I am certain that you are a failure. The bigger the teeth....just look at Heidi from the O.C. or Laguna.....NO! The Hills. Definitely The Hills. That chick has big-ass goofy f#*cking choppers and she has a successful TV show and a handsome, back-biting douche of a boyfriend! Jealous?

Look how good I look in green. I can wear a big, baggy, shapeless sweater and still look smoking hot because I chose the color of my big, baggy, shapeless sweater wisely. It brings out the deep, soulful green of my big and beautiful eyes. It's like that song....I am "PASSION'S LADY" but I am not dressed in love as Sugarloaf says. I am dressed in...you got it...a big, baggy, shapeless sweater. Smart.

I ate three pinto bean and lime rice tacos last night and I feel like a million bucks! I think I will eat pinto bean and lime rice tacos EVERY Thursday from now on. And Wednesday. Maybe Mondays too. But definitely not Sunday because that is reserved for Veggie Korma. MMMMMMMMMMMMMMMM. I love Veggie Korma! I think I'll have some tonight even though it's Friday. I'll just switch things around and have cheese pizza on Monday.....wait that's gonna be for pinto bean and....uggghhhh!!!!! I give up on life!

5 comments:

Megan said...

where are my freakin' tacos, bi-atch? the lime in the tacos matches that limey baggy sweater and your limey eyes. that's what's called a backhanded compliment.

Megan said...

i agree about the big teeth. you, my sister, and my boyfriend all have big chompers, and you are my favorites. wait, i think everyone i love has big teeth. does this mean i have a big teeth fetish? this is new to me. i thought my fetish was noses.

my teeth are sort of smallish, or mediumish; i guess i am not as brilliant as all those that i love.

Meghan said...

I have freakishly short teeth but a large gap which gives the optical allusion of horse-iness. Once, in 1996, after braces, the gap went away for like a year and it was really unattractive and people thought I'd been in a motorcycling accident. Where are you guys getting these tacos!

Kathy said...

you should give up on life. it is hopeless.

Sarah said...

We'll make the tacos for the next meeting. Right, Abby?